Convention Recap: Dragon Con 2023 - A Struggle with Balance

I consider this my first year as an attending pro. I mean, Dragon Con turned down my application to be an actual attending pro to be clear. But I vended, I did six panels, and I did three signings. I also spent most of my free time with the rest of the author crowd. I didn't have the official title maybe, but this was the first year that I really felt like I was more than just a guy in the crowd, I was there as an AUTHOR.

Which is a really, really, surreal feeling.

In other posts I have been diving much more into the nuts and bolts of my 'pro' time there. But this post is about the transition.

I've been going every year since 2013. It's literally my favorite weekend of the year. And while I have changed who I attend with a bit from those first few years, for the last 7 or so I have more or less gone with the same great group of friends. So much of my enjoyment of Dragon Con comes from that shared experience of going and doing with my people. We would all hit our own panel interests on occasion, but we always would go to a few together, be it the Palmetto Knights, or something on the Science or Paranormal Tracks. We'd spend hours in our rooms in the day resting and grabbing a quick bite to eat, and hours in the evening people watching in the Marriot.

But this year wasn't like that. The only panel that we all attended was the panel I was on in the Writer's Track, as they came out to support me as I shared the stage with the biggest names I'd ever done so with (Sherilyn Kenyon? With John Hartness and Steve Saffel? How the hell did I wind up there?). And I didn't get to spend even one hour people watching in the Marriot with them. Not a single game of Dice Throne was played on one of our beds for me to lose.

It wasn't their fault of course, it was mine. I was busy. Really busy. At least four hours every day was spent paneling and signing. Then I was getting looped in on chances to spend time with other pros. Things like that.

I still got to grab a few meals with my friends, and those times were fantastic.

But I won't lie: as much as I loved being a faux pro, I missed being just a guy in the crowd with no responsibility except to go HAVE FUN with the wife and friends.

There is a balance to be found there, I know, and this year I didn't have it. It's going to take practice. It'll probably take a little bit more of the 'new' of having bigger name authors willing/wanting to spend time with me to wear off. But I want to get to that point sooner rather than later. Advancing my career is fantastic of course. But if I don't get to enjoy the journey with my friends, then there isn't much point to it in my opinion.

I don't have an answer yet. When I do, if ever, I'll share it. But this problem caught me by surprise, and it got me down in my feels a little bit. A little bit of gray in an otherwise silver cloud.

Next year, I'll do better.